


Fear is the Heart of Love

by ToLiveForWells



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-17 06:04:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16089578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToLiveForWells/pseuds/ToLiveForWells
Summary: When the man you love is revealed to be the man who's murdered countless people and tried to murder the only people you consider family, what will you do to save the people you care about, and to save your love?





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to the anon who sent me this message which prompted this fic, you guys rock my world!   
> "A lot of the stories I read with Eowells have his lover not being afraid of him after he reveals himself as the Reverse Flash. But how do you think he'd respond if his lover *was* afraid? If she backed away from him when he tried to touch her, or she tried to run from him? What would he say/do to calm her? Would he just let her go? Would he try and convince her to stay with him? (I'm sending this to a lot of Thawne/Wells blogs so I'm curious to hear everyone's replies)"

The gloved hand reached out towards her face. Eobard still wearing the face of Harrison Wells wanted only to comfort the red and tear stained face in front of him. But the beautiful face he loved recoiled at his touch. That face which used to show undying love for him now showed only hatred and disgust.

“Please, you know I wouldn’t ever hurt you. I never have and I never will.” Eobard’s voice was thick as he knelt beside you.

“Not me, but my friends, my family, everyone else I love? What about them? You’ve laid waste to the city, you have killed without a second thought? I could never love someone like that.” you hissed through gritted teeth, fresh tears spilling over onto your cheeks.

That beauty before him sat in a tense and terrified mess with her back against the wall. He had appeared in your room in the night, he had no wish to harm y/n. You may have been the only thing in the world, any of the worlds, that he cared about. He wasn’t one for begging or showing weakness of any kind, but as he knelt by his lover’s side, his heart for the first time ached.

“You have almost killed Barry, you… you almost killed Cisco… kind of… You’ve lied, you have lied about every thing to me. Not even your face is the truth. You killed an innocent man, stole his life for your own sick and twisted SHIT!” Your voice quivered, pulling all the more at Eobard’s heart.

“I started this all for myself, yes. Everything out of hatred and out of spite, pure rage and disdain for Barry Allen and the Flash. I killed his mother because I hated him. I have known nothing but hatred my entire life before you.” He inched closer, “You have given me something greater than anything I could have accomplished on my own. You have given me Life. All I have ever wanted was to live, and you gave that to me.”

You stood suddenly, Eobard’s eyes following your’s upwards. He didn’t stand. She stood over him, a position of power, and glared down at him, “I gave you life? How many lives would I have to give you in order to return the ones you took? Innocent people, Harrison…Eobard… Whatever your name is. I loved the man who had a love for the world, the people in it. His passion and his drive, his motivation, that you have in common with whoever you were pretending to be but knowing it was all a farce? I don’t believe for a minute you loved me. Everything about you is built on lies and deceit and…” You choked, covering her eyes with hands starting to sob.

Eobard stood, pondering his options. He could just kidnap her, take her away to another earth and force her to stay with him. No, that wouldn’t work. He could change, become a better person. He almost laughed at the prospect.

He took your hands and pulled them away from your face. You struggled a bit against his grip. He let go, sped away and returned, dressed like the Harrison she knew. His bare hands took yours and your body relaxed just a bit.

“Listen,” He whispered, “I won’t try and change you, I can’t change who I am. We are who we are and nothing can take that away from us. There’s nothing I can do to convince you that my love was real, all I can tell you is that..” He sighed, his head dropping to his chest, “I love you. You stood by me to the last possible second even when everyone else knew, everyone else was doubting me. It was all what I wanted but I didn’t expect you. You were an unforeseen kink in the calculations and at first I was worried you would get in the way but you didn’t. You didn’t get in the way, you were the way.”

Without even realizing it your fingers had intertwined with his, you gazed up at him, eyes still wet with tears. His fingers gently wiped the tears from your eyes, you flinched at his touch but didn’t resist. He stepped back, one hand still holding onto yours, “the choice is yours. I won’t be stopped, but I won’t leave until you decide.”

He released your hand which dropped limply to her side as you continued to look at him. He searched her eyes for a glimmer, a shine of hope, but saw nothing but confusion. “Think about it” he leaned in whispering in your ear, pressing a kiss to the side of your head.

He sped out of the room, the gusts blowing back your hair every which way. You clutched your arms, mind in a turmoil. Never had the feelings of love and fear been so intermingled. Nothing made you feel safer than being in Harrison’s arms, eyes closed, head resting on his chest. But nothing terrified you more than the sight of the red-eyed speed demon who killed with reckless abandon. Reverse Flash had no feelings, no emotions or attachments. He was nothing like Harrison, and yet he was Harrison. You sat down on the bed, your body quivering. This was the nightmare that would not vanish in waking but would never leave unless a choice was made.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Eobard paced in a hot passion. He loved her, but after all the progress he made, how far he came and how close he was to going home. Why should he jeopardize all that he built and so expertly crafted? The one tick in the back of his head repeated her name over and over again, trying to drown out all else in his head. A noise perked his ears and he stopped his pacing and looked up to see her standing there. She stared at him with a blank face. He looked around seeing if anyone was with her, but she came alone.

“Y/n,” he said softly, and took a step forward. She backed away with a defensive hand raised.

“I haven’t made my decision.” She spoke with a hoarse voice, “I need to tell you something.”

Eobard nodded, taking a step back, giving her space. His hand motioned forward, indicating the allowance of speech.

She took a deep breath, “the only way I am going to consider coming with you is if you show me who you are. The Harrison, that face, that’s the face of a dead man. A man you killed, I remind you, years ago.”

Eobard cleared his throat, staring down at the floor, running a hand though the thick, dark hair of Harrison Wells. “Are you sure?” He asked, eyeing her curiously.

She hesitated then nodded. “If you reveal yourself, your real self… If you tell me every truth to every lie you told, maybe I’ll actually consider coming with you, if only to ensure my friends live.”

“As you wish…”

To right the wrongs? Reverse the lies and the damage? Impossible. But any inclination that he may ease her fears, he would do almost anything for her, even unveil his truest self.


	2. Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> after publication of the first "chapter" of this short fic, a few people requested a continuation. Hope you enjoy and don't forget to leave comments and kudos to make an author's day!

Harrison Wells’ face, the face you had known for so long and had so grown to love, changed before your eyes. You stared in breathless wonder, your breath caught in your chest as you watched. Dr. Wells’ long, soft-featured face start to shift. The dark mop of hair which you so constantly ran your hands through became a fixed up and pushed back set of dirty blond locks. The rounded chin with his soft lips which you kissed every day became a solid, square set jaw with tight set lips. The only thing which remained remotely similar was the icy blue eyes which still settled on your own with a look of forlorn love.

Before you knew it, Harrison Wells was gone and a complete stranger stood in front of you. Your hear was racing in your chest, filled with fear and anxiety, the disappointing reality that was sinking in that the man you thought you loved was a complete stranger.

He stood before you now. His face was unknown to you and you felt cold fear trace your spine as you faced the unknown. He straightened up, adjusting his neck and shoulders. “What do you think?” questioned the strange voice. 

“Your voice is different. You’re…” you hesitated, “I don’t…” The words wouldn’t come. The terror choked you as you heard that deep, rough, throaty voice spoke.

“It’s still me, you know. Under it all, beneath everything: the face, the guise, the facade, it was me who fell in love with you, and I hope it was me who you loved back.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat that seemed to be blocking speech and air. You finally managed to force words up, “I loved Dr. Wells. I loved… I mean, I loved you, in some twisted way, but I fell for the lies and the deceit. If you had told me all of this earlier, shown yourself to me… Who knows, maybe this could have all been different.”

“So you’re not coming with me?” Eobard asked with a slight tilt of his head. The disappointment in his voice was clear as day, even if you didn’t recognize the voice.

You stared at your feet, your hands which were clasped behind your back were going cold. “I don’t know,” you whispered, “Wells was the first person I’ve ever loved like that.”

“Like what?” Eobard took a step closer. You didn’t step back this time.

“Like, loving someone so much that you just think about them every day. You trust them, believe them, encourage them, support them no matter what. I loved you in ways that kept me up at night. Harr-Eobard,” you let out a shaky sigh, “I wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“And now?” He took a few more steps forward.

“I’m still in love with you but I don’t want to be.” You admitted, “I loved you because you were there for me. I felt like you actually truly loved me. None of that felt fake.”

“It wasn’t. I acknowledge that everything I did was under a guise for my own gain. I acknowledge that I hold such hatred for Team Flash, but never for a moment did my love for you come from falsehoods.” He stood in front of you now, not quite as tall as Harrison was, and gingerly reached a hand out which you took almost instinctively. “My love for you was the one thing amid all of this that was truthful and honest with no alternative intent or motive. I swear this to you.” 

You finally forced your eyes to look up at Eobard Thawne. You searched his face for any inkling of familiarity. You found nothing until you saw the look in his eyes. There was love in his eyes. He looked at you the same well Harrison had. He looked at you like you were the only person in the world, the only one he could ever care for. This look made you realize that, somehow, he really did love you.

“If I come with you, back to your earth,” your eyes were wet with the tears you were trying so hard to hold back, “do you promise that you will never come back here and never even think about laying a hand on anyone here?”

His hand moved up to your face, his palm gently cupping your cheek and his thumb wiping the tears away. He stood toe-to-toe with you now, his other hand had laid itself on the small of your back as he looked down at you. “For you, I would do almost anything. I can’t change who I am or what I do, but in this one instance I have forgotten everything else. If you come with me, I will never step foot on Earth-1 again. Your friends, your family, they will remain safe and untouched.”

Almost without thought you moved forward and threw your arms around him, burying your face into his shirt which still smelled like Wells. The tears were flowing freely now. This isn’t what you wanted, but this might be the one chance to save your friends. And though you didn’t want to admit it, your love for Dr. Wells was so strong, you weren’t ready to lose him, even if he had a new face.

Eobard wrapped his arms around you, his head resting on top of yours. It didn’t feel like Wells but it didn’t feel wrong. You clutched his shirt, your eyes shut again as you tried your best to imagine Wells back into existence. Everyone had to make sacrifices, and this was going to be yours. You didn’t have much in terms of family. You moved to Central City to escape your past and to start fresh. Team Flash became your family, the only people you relied on and trusted. No matter what love came into your life, you devoted yourself to doing everything you could to protect your family.

When your family was threatened by the very man you had grown to love, your mind grew tumultuous. Now everything was clear and made sense. You could save the lives of your friends, your family, and ensure their safety, and perhaps by some miracle, you could keep your love alive. With some luck, maybe you could see past the lies, the pain, the betrayal, and move on. At the very least, you could finally save the world all on your own.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Eobard looked at the fear in her eyes as he stood before her, his old face revealing itself to her for the first time. Y/n meant everything to him. The fear of losing her had grown so strong in his chest, he felt as if he might collapse before her; fall to his knees and beg. And yet, she chose him with the condition he spare her “family.”

Family was a trivial concept to Eobard. Family was something unimportant, something to get in the way of success. But he could see in y/n’s eyes that Team Flash meant everything to you. She loved them more than she ever loved him and he knew he couldn’t change this. But perhaps for this one moment he would be willing to let it all go in order to keep her in his life.

As y/n came into his arms, he almost hesitated to wrap his arms around her. She seemed so broken and fragile, usually a vision he relished in as he stood over his victims. At this time though, the vision of his love shaking at the sight of him broke his heart. When she came into his arms, holding onto him, he knew where she stood. He knew this was not a choice she wanted to make, yet her decision saved her family, her love, and her desire to have a purpose. She believed she was making a sacrifice to save some lives. Maybe she was.

Eobard stepped back, his hands holding onto her shoulders which still shook with quiet sobs, “I will do everything to take care of you and to make sure that you are safe and loved.” He crooned. “Your family will be safe and you will be too, I promise.”

She nodded, looking up at him. He hated to see her cry. He wanted only to kiss her, hold her, see the love in her eyes again. He knew that he couldn’t go any further right now, not when she was so scared. He trusted, however, that the love he held for her, and hopefully she still held somewhere for him, would overcome all else.

He took her hand tightly and leaned his forehead against hers, like he always had before, his nose gently touching her own, he looked into her eyes and she gazed back at him. Somewhere in her eyes he could see that glimmer of happiness he used to know so well. A tiny smile tugged at the corner of her mouth which triggered a smile on his own face. Soon his smile grew and hers followed suit, spreading and lighting up her face.

“It is you.” She said in a whisper so quietly he could barely hear it.

His heart jumped as she smiled up at him and reached up to his face, placing a gentle kiss on his lips. “It is me.” He whispered back, “it will always be me.”


End file.
